


You Know What They Say

by sproutingsun



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: 5x12, Actually Talking About Feelings Wow, Fix-It, Happy Ending, If You Can Get Past What Actually Happened Lmao, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-06
Updated: 2015-04-06
Packaged: 2018-03-21 15:35:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3697634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sproutingsun/pseuds/sproutingsun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mickey’s pulse boomed like rifle shots slamming heavy into his chest, over and over and over. The soles of his feet stung from hitting the concrete so roughly and frantically but the pain was numbed by pure adrenaline. He had no concern for the biting winds that were sweeping away the last memories of summer or the autumn chill working its way to his core and fighting the heat surging through his veins. Mickey felt utterly disconnected from the sensations of his physical environment. Only one thing mattered to him in that moment and before Mickey knew it, he was standing right in front of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Know What They Say

**Author's Note:**

> So this is essentially just a fix-it fic for the end of 5x12... whomp. See end notes for my mini-rant on the subject... or don't. This was honestly therapeutic to write and I sincerely wish for all of you guys who were hurt by this episode/season as I was to find comfort in reading or writing. I hope this story can help you to move on from the horrible disaster that was Shameless Season 5 and finally find peace. Bless you all. XOXOXO

Mickey’s pulse boomed like rifle shots slamming heavy into his chest, over and over and over. The soles of his feet stung from hitting the concrete so roughly and frantically but the pain was numbed by pure adrenaline. He had no concern for the biting winds that were sweeping away the last memories of summer or the autumn chill working its way to his core and fighting the heat surging through his veins. Mickey felt utterly disconnected from the sensations of his physical environment. Only one thing mattered to him in that moment and before Mickey knew it, he was standing right in front of him.

Ian sat reclined on the steps of the Gallagher house, zoned out and waiting, seemingly lost in thought. At the shuffling on the sidewalk, he turned his head. His eyes were red and puffy.

“The fuck you been?” Mickey blurted out, still breathing heavily, whether from the running or the anxiety, he wasn’t sure.

Ian hesitated. “With my mom,” he said, looking slightly ashamed. “I thought she’d get it, you know?”

Mickey nodded in understanding but could sense Ian’s discomfort. “You okay?” he asked.

Ian slowly turned his whole body so that he was sitting on the edge of the stair, facing Mickey. He placed his hands on his knees and slouched down, sighing. “I don’t know,” he said sadly, barely above a whisper. His wavering voice betrayed his brokenness. “It’s like I don’t even know who I am half the time.” Ian paused for a small moment as if saying the next few words would pain him especially. “You deserve better than that,” he said shakily.

Realization kicked in and Mickey felt his stomach drop. He knew where this conversation was headed, why he had been called here. Desperately, he took a step closer. “I love you,” he said.

“You don’t owe me anything,” Ian said quietly, shaking his head as his eyebrows knit together.

“No, shut the fuck up,” Mickey interjected. Ian’s head snapped up so that he was looking Mickey directly in the eyes. The stare held without a word for a tense moment. 

Mickey forfeited, squeezing his eyes shut. He inhaled deeply and slowly exhaled. He continued speaking, this time soft and genuine. “I mean it, okay? I’m not lying to make you feel better or ‘cause I feel bad for you. I really mean it.” He paused, but kept himself steady. “I’m in love with you, Ian.”

Ian’s harsh expression faded into one of awe, the release of tension leaving his lips slightly parted. Tears filled his eyes and he did nothing to stop their falling. “You, uh – you’ve never said that before,” he choked out, wiping uselessly at his damp face.

“Yeah,” Mickey said, slightly taken aback by Ian’s emotional reaction. “I know. I didn’t know how much you needed to hear it.”

A mix between a sob and a laugh escaped Ian’s mouth.

Mickey squished into the small space beside Ian on the step and took his hand, squeezing. Neither of them said a word for what felt like forever.

Ian broke the silence after some time. “There’s just so much wrong with me, Mick.”

Mickey stroked the back of Ian’s hand with his thumb. “We’ll figure it out.”

Ian sighed. “Nothing you can do can fix me.”

“You’re not broken, Ian.”

“I know!” Ian shouted, giving in to the frustration and pulling his hand away. “I know. Which means this is how I’m always going to be. I’m me. Just me. You can’t change it and I’m only going to keep hurting you.”

Offended, Mickey shot up. “You really think it wouldn’t hurt me more to know you’re dealing with all this shit alone? How fucking selfish do you think I am?” Mickey rubbed his face with his palms and looked up to the dead, grey sky. He sighed, sitting back down. “We’re supposed to take care of each other. If that means I get hurt… then I’ll deal with it.”

“How am I supposed to take care of you when I can’t even take care of myself?” Ian asked. “I heard what Fiona said. I don’t want you sitting around worrying, watching me, waiting for me to do my next crazy shit. I can’t just take your life from you.”

“You aren't taking anything from me. How many years did you watch my back while I was out stirring up shit in this fucking neighbourhood, huh? I better at least return the favour.” Mickey reached up to brush the hair out of Ian’s face and rested his hand atop his boyfriend’s head. “You know what they say right? Through thick and thin, good times and bad, sickness, health… all that shit. I want to be with you, Ian. It isn’t a chore. You aren't taking anything from me. It's the opposite."

A small smile materialized on Ian’s face and quickly grew. “You proposing to me?” he asked jokingly. Mickey returned the goofy grin and they chuckled softly until their laughter blew away in the wind. The resulting silence was peaceful and warm despite the cool air.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Mickey proclaimed. “I’m in this.”

Ian’s heart was beating a mile a minute. This is where they were. The Mickey sitting next to him in close proximity, confessing his love and devotion and laughing like they weren’t fucked for life wasn’t even remotely similar to the emotionally unavailable, closeted, dirt-covered boy he had fallen for when he was fifteen. Ian had poured his heart and soul into loving Mickey Milkovich and for years he was unsure if the other boy’s feelings were comparable, let alone mutual. It looked like he finally had his answer.

“Yeah, okay,” Ian said gently, his smile soft and sincere.

Mickey wrapped one arm around Ian’s back and draped the other across his shoulders, holding him tighter than ever before. Ian buried his face in Mickey’s neck, breathing him in.

“I’m not losing you again,” he heard Mickey whisper.

Monica had been right. Ian did need someone who would love him for who he was. And he had found him. He was waiting for him all along, whether he knew it or not.

All uncertainty alleviated, silently, Ian answered.

_No, you’re not._

**Author's Note:**

> Okay. So. I am honestly super disappointed with the direction they went for the breakup (if they had to break them up in the first place) not just from a viewer's perspective but also from a writer's perspective. It felt unnatural and lazy, left a lot of loose ends and basically voided any character development Ian had made over the duration of the season (the Ian in the breakup scene was not Ian). It was bad writing, plain and simple. It was a slap in the face to the complex and beautiful relationship the writers have created over the past 5 seasons, especially if rumours are true and this really is the end. Even if it's not, I don't see how they could fix it anyways, as the coldhearted, OOC Ian seen has essentially tainted the canon relationship for me (Ian is my favourite character and this breaks my fucking heart). Endgame does nothing for me if my favourite characters have been assassinated in the process. No, I am not saying I could write a whole show better than these professional writers, but it is indisputable that the Ian/Mickey finale was a sloppy trainwreck, and quite frankly, insulting to the fans. 
> 
> I could rant about this for hours but I'm gonna stop myself now.
> 
> tl;dr The breakup sucked and this fic is my way of finding closure. I hope it helps some of you out too. Stay strong my fellow trashers.


End file.
